[ the wrong kind of wrong ]

[winterlive]

this one friend of mine likes almost no kind of music but country - new country/pop, not the old stuff. sometimes, when we would drive around and i just couldn't take it anymore, i would demand that we listen to ANYTHING ELSE, so she would pop in one of the two other CDs she owned: Big Shiny Tunes #, or the coyote ugly soundtrack. i was astonished to discover, on first listening, that some of the tracks belonging to leanne rimes didn't actually suck as hard as i thought they would. they were gay and dancey, you know the kind, just a dumb song you kind of like.

today, i watched the movie.

the pivotal moment, i felt, was when our heroine's gorgeous turkish boyfriend (who, earlier in the movie, did an entire stripper routine for a huge pile of women jockeying to BUY him) told her that because she danced on a bar in sexy clothes, she was a whore.

yes, her father telling her that her working at that bar made him ASHAMED of her was also high on the list. but see, daddy apologized for being such an obnoxious, self-serving prick. he might not have totally reformed, but he at least acknowledged he was in the wrong.

not like gorgeous turkish boyfriend, whose big extending of the hand of reconciliation was - i am not even kidding - that if our heroine wanted to, she could come HELP HIM UNLOAD FISH.

oh, no, no, dear. let me explain something to you. i want you to pay very close attention, gorgeous turkish boyfriend, okay? ready? this is important, so listen: go fuck yourself. fuck your mother. fuck everything about you, you horrific, arrogant, sanctimonious hypocrite.

i always liked christina aguilera. she wore tight, leather clothes with peekaboo cutouts and sang songs with too many Rs in them about how much she looooooved sex. and let me tell you, people did not like that. people called her a big whore. xtina, the bad one, the one that'd burn out, classless trailer trash.

not like that sweet britney spears. she was saving herself for MARRIAGE. she was so pretty.

ps fuck you.



FRAIGH, SO ANGRY.

anyway, god. cee did this meme (and came up with MORE KONO, people; run, don't walk) and i like it, so i'm stealing it.

Give me one of my own stories, and a timestamp sometime in the future after the end of the story, or sometime in the past before the story started, and I'll write you at least a hundred words of what happened then, whether it's five minutes before the story started or ten years in the future, unless it's that one single story i wrote that's all porn all the time, b/c there's there's that exactly one of you that always asks for that one but it's just more porn, so nothing doing, pick something else.

Comments

[setissma.livejournal.com]

You know what I'm gonna ask for. PICK YOUR TIME OF CHOICE.

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

i have no idea what you're going to ask for, and YOU have to pick a time. that's the POINT. lazy bones. <3

[traveller.livejournal.com]

roo.

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

my god, cee. i LOVE HIM.

[jamesinboots.livejournal.com]

this is important, so listen: go fuck yourself. fuck your mother. fuck everything about you, you horrific, arrogant, sanctimonious hypocrite.

*cheers!*

I was a Christina girl too. I covet all those chaps she used to wear. *paws*

Because I must: how about 4 years, 6 months after Meiyo (the 7th part) ends in Monogatari?

*shrug* ... I'm just sayin'. *hands*

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

okay, jim.

four and a half years, hm hm.

jared is having his first baby, right about then. his wife is a lovely young lady, she was introduced to him by mai, you remember the lady from thailand. the girl is a quarter thai, and there was a HUUUUUGE bru-a-hah over that in the shogunate, let me tell you. but jared made a point of saying, listen, i'm half white, and if you accept THAT, you pretty much have to accept this too. just like when jared took his place as shogun, some of the buke left rather than submit to jared's rule. still others made inquiries about coming in from other shogunates, and all were accepted. there was more loss than gain, in the end, but what do you do, right?

so yes, the latest mrs. watanabi, kiyoshiko, lies in her marriage bed per tradition, surrounded by her midwives and her women friends, which of course includes mrs. nihonjiro. sayomi helped kiyoshiko understand what it was that their husbands shared, helped her adjust to it, and so super-close they became that their husbands tease them now about having a similar relationship. they blush and giggle and never confirm or deny, so that's fun for them all.

sayomi is a big help just now, because this is kiyo's first child, and sayomi has already had her first, a daughter. she and jensen are trying for a second now, and though sayomi always says she is trying for a son, no father could be more in love with his daughter than jensen is with his. rinko tells anyone who'll listen that little koneko is going to be a samurai when she grows up, just like daddy, and jensen makes noises about how she can do anything she wants, but they all know he'd lose his mind with joy if she decided to come to the dojo.

kuma is here now, with jared and jensen in an adjoining room. every time kiyo makes a noise, even to ask a question, muffled through the door, jared starts to get up and go. jensen and kuma haul him back down, easy, tiger.

when his son is born a few hours later, it will be the happiest moment of his life. many moments before and after will come close, but neko and jason will have arrived by then, and to be surrounded by one's friends and family - happy, healthy, whole - that is better than anything else there is. politics is just the day job.

[bookishwench.livejournal.com]

Personally, I liked Christina because the girl has an amazing set of pipes. I've never seen Coyote Ugly, but what you're describing doesn't exactly sell me on going to see it. Yuck.

And for the meme... I'm picking an oldie but a goody. Affected. Two years prior. Either point of view.

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

god, you don't pick the easy ones, do you? ruh.

here's the thing about affected: it is a world where buffy never came to sunnydale. (or stayed dead after the master killed her, and spike is not a vampire, but whatever, AU.) i think it's freshman or junior year of high school for xander, so he's doing about what you'd expect - fumbling about, fucking up, helping willow and giles as best he can.

buffy herself is in london, she's one of spike's acquaintances. she was picked up early in life by a big name voice coach school (possibly called "the watcher council"). it would be wrong to say they are friends, obvs, but they know each other. gunn is watching angel try to juggle lindsey and spike at the moment - lindsey owns angel's ass, but angel's having a thing with spike and it's going to go south soon. spike will pull some nefarious shenanigans to get away from angel with his pride intact, and that will prompt angel to later get in touch with spike's young, impressionable new boyfriend and warn him that spike is BAD BAD BAD VERY BAD MAN. wesley's fledgling art gallery is just starting to make a name for itself, despite his father's assurances that he's wasting his time.

it alllll comes together, my friend. *yin yang hands*

[nevcolleil.livejournal.com]

Not About That (JA/MR) - the day after :)

or The Villain/The Hero - 2 years later.

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

omg what awesome choices. i can't tell you what happens after the villain/the hero, or i'll never write the last of the triptych. so you get jensen/michael.

The day after that is a Friday. Jared's going to stay here for the weekend, he's got his new house to unpack, his new yard to litter with dog toys. Jensen is going. Jensen has his ticket ready.

He meets up with Mike while they're getting shuffled through VIP customs at seven in the morning. "Hey," he says, and buries his nose in his coffee cup.

"Fuck you," Mike grunts, and shoves his jacket in the plastic bin to get x-rayed. The customs guy doesn't bat an eye, looking half asleep.

Jensen smiles. There's only one person who gets bitchier in the mornings than he does, and it's Rosey. "You're a ball of sunshine," he murmurs.

Mike grunts again, this time just a noise. He shuffles through the metal detector, barefoot and squinting against the sunrise, and spreads his hands so they can wand him. Things squeal all over him and he has to practically get naked for the woman before she'll let him past. He doesn't even have the common courtesy to flirt with her, and Jensen winces.

Nothing squeals when he goes through. He has duplicates of all his toiletries in Los Angeles, so he doesn't carry anything with him. His lighter and smokes are in a sealed, clear plastic bag, per ordinance.

Mike's bag is half full when he comes away from the table, fighting a shoe onto one foot. Jensen waits by the doors. "I hate this fucking place," Mike growls, dark lines under his eyes. "When do we board?"

"An hour," Jensen says, enjoying the instant flare of rage in Mike's eyes. "We got delayed."

"Fuck!"

"Oh, calm down."

Mike grabs Jensen's sleeve by the shoulder and starts hauling him toward the bathroom. "It wasn't just color commentary, you fucking idiot."

Jensen blinks. "Oh."

It's not nice. Mike chases some poor Canadian commuter out of the bathroom, and the guy can't stop apologizing. Mike just bolts the door in his face. It's a shove up against the hard counter, a biting kiss and a fast fumble of zippers. Long-fingered hands find their way into Jensen's pants, gripping hard, demanding, and before Jensen can get out a Jesus, Michael, he's being pulled and tugged just so.

Who does that kind of thing? In an airport bathroom? Jensen is forced to answer himself: Me.

Mike sleeps through the flight, but Jensen can't nod off. He knows something has to change. He wants it to.

He just has to make it happen.

[traveller.livejournal.com]

in other news, i request SEATTLE. reunion secks, however damn many years down the road that was.

[bunnymcfoo.livejournal.com]

seconded, omg!

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

i said a hundred words, hooligan. not ten thousand. but i will do what i can.

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

okay, i make no guarantees that this is going to be anything like what really happens next in this story. this might be what happens, or it might not. i don't even know for sure if it's 200 or not, but it's good, it's right. so.



Michael breathes against the curve of Tom's hip, soft and warm on his nose. They've been at this for hours, or what feels like it. "I didn't mean to," Michael says, pushing his thumbnail against tender skin. "I wanted..."

"Sorry," Tom says, his voice shuddering a little. One wide hand rubs over that flat stomach, a soft rush of skin on skin. "Please," he says. "Michael."

"Nobody calls me that," Mike tells him, telling secrets, telling stories. He brushes his mouth over that warm, thin skin, hitches closer to the heavy length that rests just there, brushing against his cheek. "I never got a chance to tell you. Only you ever called me Michael."

Tom slips his hand over the curve of Michael's head, into his hair, weighing him down. "You said it," he mumbles, deep and liquid. "You told me your name and I never forgot it. I'm such shit with names, oh, God."

"Not mine," Michael says, licking soft salt from his lips.

Tom mirrors him, pink lips shining in the aftermath. "No. Never."

[lavenderfrost.livejournal.com]

I never liked Britney or Christina until years later. At least I was consistent? >.>;; It wasn't over any slut issues, though. I just found most of their songs to be annoying as hell.

As for the meme? Spare Time, sometime around "Tall Tales".

[way2busymom.livejournal.com]

By the Letter...maybe when Jared is making up his playlist? So that would be before the story takes place? *grins*

[svmadelyn.livejournal.com]

Did you see these? Specifically, the first and last one.

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

alkdfjlkajsdlkjhbfkjbxcv!! OH MADELYN. *wrap around*

[vinylroad.livejournal.com]

Ugh. Coyote Ugly. So much about that movie bugged me; I wanted to punch at each of those characters at least once during the movie. Especially Mr. I-huck-fish-I'm-above-it-all, who was clearly only terrified of the fact that she had suddenly become rather assertive about her sexuality. OMG, she's not afraid of dancing clothed on a bar in front of men, she's a WHORE! Asshole.

I loved Christina Aguilera (and still do) not because she was ~provocative~ or whatever, but because she had a lot of talent and didn't hand out apologies or placative answers to people because they found her overly sexual behaviour "unacceptable". And I fucking love that. I love people that are honest and intelligent, and I was always pretty amazed at how smart and eloquent she was in interviews. And I enjoyed her music.

And I am so sorry for this (I told you, I have a gift), but I want more tailgate or good boys don't. I know everyone else is going to be picking J2 (and I look forward to reading it because you know how I feel about your J2), but gimme gimme some het, omg. Why do you insist on writing het that ends its storylines with a pretty concrete sense of finality? :P So, tailgate or good boys don't (god, can we just pretend ladyface didn't go and pop out a couple kids?) three years after the end. If you don't want to touch those, any of your het stories three years down the line. I'm not picky.

[lavenderfrost.livejournal.com]

With Coyote Ugly, I found it helped a bunch to just put the movie on "mute" or skip forward until you get to the cool music moments and bar-dancing. And the singing at the end. ^^;;

In fact, I only liked it for the soundtrack anyway. >_>

[sophie-448.livejournal.com]

Oh, wow. Coyote Ugly. I've managed to block out most of my memories of that movie. So many better things to occupy my mental space ;-)

Ooh, best meme ever! Monogatari, at any point up to five years after the end (not counting epiloguey stuff) and if the boys could be alone, that would be amazing. Not necessarily for sex, just away from the prying eyes of protocol if you know what I mean ;-)

[robanybody.livejournal.com]

not like that sweet britney spears.

My argument FOR YEARS. Xtina all the way.

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

I LOVE YOU.

[ahestele.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that whole Coyote Movie was an exercise in fail.

However, a little known fact is that lesbians all over Texas own it just so they can watch the bar dancing Devil Went Down to Georgia scene over and over.

My culture, I don't know.

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

hee hee! i do love that song, no lie. :D

[lishakatz.livejournal.com]

lol I know who you are talking about hehe trying living with all that music.

[winterlive.livejournal.com]

i think not, my darling. <333

[thenyxie.livejournal.com]

Oh, yay! *glees* Someone already asked for the Tom/Michael reunion. So... More Fairy Tale: A True Story? How about one year later?

hello

[(Anonymous)]

National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had funded a project with the US auto makers for the past five years. The NTSB covertly funded a project whereby the auto makers were installing black boxes in four wheel drive pickup trucks in an effort to determine, in fatal accidents, the circumstances in the last 15 seconds before the crash. They were surprised to find in 49 of the 50 states the last words of drivers in 61.2% of fatal crashes were, "Oh, Shit!" Only the state of Texas was different, where 89.3% of the final words were, "Hey Y'all, hold my beer and watch this!"

hello

[(Anonymous)]

Don't Worry, Be Happy! =)